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Calli
09-18-2006, 03:45 AM
We started to "bud" in our blouses at 9 or 10 years old only to find that anything that came in contact with those tender, blooming buds hurt so bad it brought us to tears. So came the ridiculously uncomfortable training bra contraption that the boys in school would snap until we had calluses on our backs.

Next, we get our periods in our early to mid-teens (or sooner). Along with those budding boobs, we bloated, we cramped, we got the hormone crankies, had to wear little mattresses between our legs or insert tubular, packed cotton rods in places we didn't even know we had.

Our next little rite of passage was having sex for the first time which was
about as much fun as having a ramrod push your uterus through your nostrils (IF he did it right and didn't end up with his little cart before his horse), leaving us to wonder what all the fuss was about.

Then it was off to Motherhood where we learned to live on dry crackers and water for a few months so we didn't spend the entire day leaning over Brother John. Of course, amazing creatures that we are (and we are), we learned to live with the growing little angels inside us steadily kicking our innards night and day making us wonder if we were preparing to have Rosemary's Baby.

Our once flat bellies looked like we swallowed a whole watermelon and we pee'd our pants every time we sneezed. When the big moment arrived, the dam in our blessed Nether Regions invariably burst right in the middle of the mall and we had to waddle, with our big cartoon feet, moaning in pain all the way to the ER.

Then it was huff and puff and beg to die while the OB says, "Please stop screaming, Mrs. Hear-me-roar. Calm down and push. "Just one more good push" (more like 10), warranting a strong, well-deserved impulse to punch the
%$#*@*#!* hubby and doctor square in the nose for making us cram a wiggling, mushroom-headed 10 pound bowling ball through a keyhole.

After that, it was time to raise those angels only to find that when all that "cute" wears off, the beautiful little darlings morphed into walking, jabbering, wet, gooey, snot-blowing, life-sucking little poop machines.

Then come their "Teen Years." Need I say more?

When the kids are almost grown, we women hit our voracious sexual prime in our early 40's - while hubby had his somewhere around his 18th birthday.

So we progress into the grand finale: "The Menopause," the Grandmother of all womanhood. It's either take HRT and chance cancer in those now seasoned "buds" or the aforementioned Nether Regions, or, sweat like a hog in July, wash your sheets and pillowcases daily and b ite the head off anything that moves.

Now, you ask WHY women seem to be more spiteful than men, when men get off so easy, INCLUDING the icing on life's cake: Being able to pee in the woods without soaking their socks...

So, while I love being a woman, "Womanhood" would make the Great Gandhi a tad crabby. You think women are the "weaker sex?"
Yeah right. Bite me.

Chopper_Bob
09-18-2006, 04:32 AM
Lol ! :D :rolleyes: :D was raised with 2 sisters, I am lucky I ( or they) survived !

groucho

BaltoHarleyHon
09-18-2006, 06:17 AM
:o Phew...it's a wonder we make it at all... :D

that Timex on your arm ain't the only thing that takes a lickin' and keeps on tickin'... groucho

Sandman
09-18-2006, 09:19 AM
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: so this is why yer such a bitch :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

MSG6567
09-18-2006, 11:22 AM
Seems to me I've been told a similar story by the wife. Don't forget we (men- the cause of most problems) also have lived with about 2/3 of what you described. Feel sorry for you women but going through menopause is no picnic for the men either. Seems to me I have been reminded of being the cause of most of the world's problems. HaHa

Shorty
09-18-2006, 04:46 PM
Wow, I got crabby just reading it! :lol:

harleycutie
09-18-2006, 05:28 PM
Yup, I'm thinking the men have got it made compared to us.....I'm also thinking I'll just stay in the voracious prime time early to mid 40s for a long time, boobs It sure is too bad men aren't in their prime same time as women, we'd all be smiling lots more!!!! I'm gonna bypass menopause; geez I'll have to move to someplace cooler if I go thru that...... :D

Revvitup
09-18-2006, 05:46 PM
I guess it must be cuz of the MEN :




MENopause and MENstruation (and MENfolk) ??

And since women are good at sharing, we let them know it... :P

Shorty
09-18-2006, 05:48 PM
And since women are good at sharing, we let them know it... :PFuckinA! :lol: :lol: :lol:

MedievalWoman
09-18-2006, 06:15 PM
Damn Calli, I've been through most of that and am in the early 40's prime. I'll just opt to get Alzheimer’s a little earlier than most and won't remember Menopause. :huh:

wreckerman
09-18-2006, 10:33 PM
and all this time i thought it was this

springer
09-18-2006, 10:52 PM
Whiner :lol: :lol: :lol:

momsridin
09-19-2006, 01:53 PM
Gotta admit as foolish as this sounds it makes me feel sorry for Ram hehehe He lives with 3 of us :P

OldBikerGuy
09-19-2006, 01:59 PM
Well, there's a cynical look at womanhood. ^_^ I've actually known chicks who were (and are) proud of their boobies, loved to wear sexy bras, enjoyed sex (usually), and couldn't wait to have their next baby. ;)

Calli
09-19-2006, 05:39 PM
Lol... quite the reactions!

OBG - I LOVE this body of mine!!! .. it has brought me thru some pretty amazing shit & still forgives me!!! ( well, some days! It seems to have issues with the beads & feathers on a certain thong though... :huh: )

Springer... :P Whiner indeed!

& yes, HC, it would be Very nice if men were Prime, when we are!! lol ( or was that very Nice men in their prime...hmmm)

Wreck those are cute :) I can think of some different tools they could be carrying though...lol

MW how about just skip them both?! Or have them at the same time! lol

Rev.. yeah yeah it's all about you guys, we know.. ( & thank us once in awhile for letting you keep Thinking that, ok??? ;) )

MSG nope, it isn't easy on you guys either, but it Could be worse!!!

Shorty
09-19-2006, 05:53 PM
Ok, I keep hearing about men not being in their prime in their 40s......huh?? They might not be in the best of shape anymore but what 40 yr old male around here isnt ready, willing, and able to bump uglies with the most active and sexual of women? I think our middle ages boys can hold their own. 18 is prime for a male? Eewwww. They are so ignorant at 18 hehe.

OldBikerGuy
09-19-2006, 06:13 PM
It sure is too bad men aren't in their prime same time as women, we'd all be smiling lots more!!!!


I never understood where that fallacy came from. In reality, most women start losing all interest in sex a few weeks after they get married, while men just keep getting hornier and hornier -- but not for their wives.

The solution is, of course, to ban marriage! :o :D

Shorty
09-19-2006, 07:52 PM
It sure is too bad men aren't in their prime same time as women, we'd all be smiling lots more!!!!


I never understood where that fallacy came from. In reality, most women start losing all interest in sex a few weeks after they get married, while men just keep getting hornier and hornier -- but not for their wives.

The solution is, of course, to ban marriage! :o :DJust cos your wife stopped fucking you doesnt mean thats going on in other households. Thats your reality, not mine.

OldBikerGuy
09-19-2006, 08:11 PM
It sure is too bad men aren't in their prime same time as women, we'd all be smiling lots more!!!!


I never understood where that fallacy came from. In reality, most women start losing all interest in sex a few weeks after they get married, while men just keep getting hornier and hornier -- but not for their wives.

The solution is, of course, to ban marriage! :o :DJust cos your wife stopped fucking you doesnt mean thats going on in other households. Thats your reality, not mine.

It's a generalization based on what you hear from others, newspapers, magazines, TV, etc. It has nothing to do with my personal life. If women were 1/10 as horny as men do you think anything constructive would ever get done? I knew this post would get the predictable "I'm a woman and I'm horny!" response, but speaking across the population (think soccer mom, not biker chick) you'll find this to be true.

Shorty, I detect some hostility in your reply. Is there anything you'd like to share with the group? :lol:

Shorty
09-19-2006, 08:23 PM
Backstepper. You said it was reality, not a generalization based on the media.
I sound hostile OBG? hehe Me? :D

MedievalWoman
09-19-2006, 08:26 PM
My relationship will be two years old in January and we're still in the honeymoon phase. ;)

OldBikerGuy
09-19-2006, 08:35 PM
My relationship will be two years old in January and we're still in the honeymoon phase. ;)

YAAAWN .... sample size of one. Go sample the bleachers at a kid's soccer match. You'll notice they all have crow's feet from the time they're late 20's. That's from going, "You want me to suck WHAAAAT???" :lol:

Shorty
09-20-2006, 02:24 AM
My relationship will be two years old in January and we're still in the honeymoon phase. ;)

YAAAWN .... sample size of one. Go sample the bleachers at a kid's soccer match. You'll notice they all have crow's feet from the time they're late 20's. That's from going, "You want me to suck WHAAAAT???" :lol:Is that what they say when you show em your dick OBG? Cos bleacher bitches or not, any chick I know can tell a dick from a prick.

harleycutie
09-20-2006, 02:51 AM
Well, there's a cynical look at womanhood. ^_^ I've actually known chicks who were (and are) proud of their boobies, loved to wear sexy bras, enjoyed sex (usually), and couldn't wait to have their next baby. ;)

Well I'd say 3 out of 4 isn't bad then huh??? ;)

Righteous2
09-20-2006, 04:12 AM
Well, there's a cynical look at womanhood. ^_^ I've actually known chicks who were (and are) proud of their boobies, loved to wear sexy bras, enjoyed sex (usually), and couldn't wait to have their next baby. ;)

Well I'd say 3 out of 4 isn't bad then huh??? ;)yea babyyyyyyyyyyy thats what i wanan hear ;)

bikerbabe8500
10-15-2006, 06:38 PM
Okay I actually feel sorry for Squirrel and Squirrel Jr.....in a few years there will be 2 crabby women in the house....at least there will an equal balance of male hormones in our house! :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

squirrel71477
10-16-2006, 01:11 AM
No Chit!!! Maybe I need to go gwet a male dog to have a male dominance in the house!!! :lol: