A man goes to the doctor feeling very ill. The doctor checks him over and says,
"I'm so sorry, I have some bad news, you have Yellow 24, a really deadly virus. It's called Yellow 24, because it turns your blood yellow and you usually only have 24 hours to live.
There's no known cure, so just go home and enjoy your final precious moments on earth."
So, depressed, he trudges home to his wife and breaks the bad news. Distraught, she asks him to go to the bingo with her that evening as he's never been there with her before.
They arrive at the bingo and with his first card he gets four corners and wins £50.
Then, with the same card, he gets a line and wins £350.
Then he gets the full house and wins £1000.
Then the National Game comes up and he wins that as well, winning £400,000!
The bingo caller gets him up on stage and says, "Son, I've been here 20 years and I've never seen anyone win four corners, a line, the full house and the National Game on the same card.
You must be the luckiest man on Earth!"
"Lucky?" the bloke screams, "Lucky? I'll have you know I've got Yellow 24."
"F*** me," shouts the bingo caller, "You've won the bloody raffle as well!"
Before modern times there was walking, but not the perfection of walking, because there was no tea.
That's luck ain't it.
Life is best experienced in the company of a woman.
Was mich nicht umbringt, macht mich stärker
I'm not here for a long time I'm here for a good time.